My New Year’s Resolution Starts Today

Got back from vacation yesterday. First off, I’d like to apologize to the woman sitting in seat 9A for my daughter kicking your seat and trying out different hair styles for your noggin. I promise, we’re good parents. She’s just a little ball of energy that just has to indulge her creative side.

Anyway, getting back from South Florida we found out that Kentucky is a total culture shock – and not in a good way! I’d like to move one day since really, the most exciting thing to do here is drink Bourbon (I prefer Bloody Mary) and visit the Ohio River (or what I sometimes mistake as WIlly Wonka’s chocolate river).


But no matter where you live it’s depressing coming back from vacation. But even more depressing is what my Wii Fit Plus told me. I haven’t weighed myself in some time, but when my belt ends can’t even connect, I realized it was time to take a look. When I wash my chest and stomach in the shower it’s like doing the hand motions for the river part in “I’ve Got a River of Life.” Here’s the wonderful news my Wii Fit Plus gave to me:


And don’t be fooled by that 19.6-pound increase in weight. After I saw this I went straight to the kitchen and downed half my bottle of Bloody Mary boosting me up to exactly 20.0. Hey, I don’t want it tempting me in the kitchen this week!

So I’m starting my New Year’s resolution early. Because by the time January First rolls around, I’ll be that much closer to being as skinny as I want to be and able to dress more like Owen Grady rather than Andy Dyer.

Sure I’ve got my birthday and Thanksgiving and Christmas coming up, but the good thing about starting my diet now is that I’ll get to take breaks for those holidays. Not week-long binges like I’ve been doing, but a turkey sandwich here, a slice of cake there. I’ve got two toddlers and two dogs who will eat anything I leave behind.

So do I have a target weight and a goal? No way! I’m an author, not a scientist. I follow no formula, set no goals. I go at it as though writing a book – I just do it. When it’s done it’s done. But the Wii asked me to set a goal, so I did:


So there you have it. And despite the cold weather we’re about to have, I’m also going to exercise. Anyone want to join me, feel free to post your goals and pictures at #AndrewsAwesomeAutumn and we’ll see who endures the holidays and loses the most weight by January 1st! Ready? Set. (One more drink.) Go!

Published by Andrew Toy

Writer when I'm not being a husband or dad. So mostly just a husband and dad.

14 thoughts on “My New Year’s Resolution Starts Today

  1. A friend of mine and I started a “Biggest Loser” challenge back in June. I managed to lose seven pounds between June and September. Then I too went on vacation. 12 days in Europe. I’ve been afraid to get on the scale since I got back (Oct. 4th). All that to say, count me in. I’ll buzz my friend and we’ll start another round (he’s $40 up so I need this opportunity to earn my money back). I’m not on Twitter and so don’t know how to hashtag, but I will be on the lookout for your progress posts, and will be sure to post a few of my own as well.

    Cheers! 🙂


    1. You can find the Hashtag on Facebook. Come join the fun and round your friends up! On New Year’s Eve we’ll all post how much we’ve lost while the world is busy walking off their holiday buzz 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I apologize. The opening statement on this post was a total and complete exaggeration. My kids didn’t play with anyone’s hair, though my daughter did kick the seat in front of her once or twice, but other than that they were very good and the lady in 9A told us what sweet kids we have. As a writer it’s easy to exaggerate some things for effect.


      1. Just moved in today. Been living on the road for about two weeks. But I’ve been eating quite healthy. 🙂 I think I went to the gym three times this week. I need to get my numbers tomorrow morning though so I can track my #. Good luck us!!


  2. 10 pounds in two weeks is not realistic. You have to lose 3500 calories to lose one pound; If you eat 500 calories less than what is needed to sustain you calorie wise each day, you will lose about one pound a week. A rule of thumb figure for calculating the weight you can be sustained at is to take your current weight and multiply it by 10 if you are very inactive, 12 if you are moderately active, and 15 if you are training for the Olympics or other suitably rigorous sports activities. Then subtract 500 calories from that total, and that is your daily calories. About every five pounds, recalculate the calorie amount.

    The alternative is to decide what weight you want to be at, then multiply it by 10, 12, or 15 and use that amount as your permanent calorie goal. That way it never needs to be changed. if you have a lot of weight to lose, method 1 is better for consistency, but if you have less than 30 pounds, either way works well.

    Good luck!



    1. Thank you for the head’s up. I was actually being sarcastic when I posted that picture/goal, but now that I’m losing literally a pound a day, I just might keep it up!

      Liked by 1 person

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